"Love" replys - 3

Xillie · Xillie on Sun Oct 19, 2008 12:10 pm

You need to read my other poem called "Love" before you read this, (so that it makes sence) if you haven't already.
I was asked to make a reply to that poem a few weeks back, but i couldn't decide how to do it. Wether to accept the proposal or reject it. So i did both!

Xillie · Xillie on Sun Oct 19, 2008 12:11 pm

Forever

Talking all the time

I never want to say Good-Bye

For up until this time with you

My life had been a lie

If we really don’t exist

That’s alright by me

This feeling deep within my heart

It’s real enough, and free

You know I’ll always be here

Because our love will never die

For every time your near me

My heart is light enough to fly

Ignore what they say

We belong together

Remember I’m here

And I’ll love you forever

Xillie · Xillie on Sun Oct 19, 2008 12:13 pm

Hurt

You say you don’t deserve me

And I think it may be true

Because for all the times you’ve hurt me

I simply can’t forgive you

My existence is questionable

Even to myself

After being trapped for so long

In my own personal Hell

You said you’d always be there

But I know that was a lie

Because when I really needed you

There was no shoulder on which to cry

Call it what you want

But I cannot rise above

If this is what it truly is

I want no more of Love

raining_roses · raining_roses on Thu Mar 05, 2009 3:17 pm

I found a mistake in the

"Forever poem"

L.4 "live" i think you meant "life"

unless that has some cryptic meaning that I have missed massivly.

now on to what i think.

I love the coloring that you placed it makes the poem pop out more and you create a nice contrast between the two poems. Your rhyming is well placed and it seems like Light vs. Dark type of poetic marker. I as always love your work and this has not disappointed. Well done love.

~Nikki